Only 50 more years to retirement

The past couple of days have been challenging for me at work. It has been somewhat pathetic to realize that the biggest threat to my job security right now is my own incompetence. So in that spirit, here's a little news story that will either make you feel better about yourself, or if you're like me, feel some empathy for this schmuck of a buffoon of a boob:

"A man in Grand Rapids, Mich., who hid knives in his pants to try to steal them from a store tripped while fleeing and stabbed himself in the abdomen, police said."

-- Reported in the Express on Jan 9, 2008